'Dont trust anything that bleeds for 5 days and stays alive'?

I was reading somewhere that every girl should have a self-defense plan in mind,

so that if the need ever arises we won't be caught off-guard and victimized.

I stopped what I was doing at that time (watching tap dance vids on youtube) to get my plan ready.

I'm not gonna tell you what my self-defense plans are because it is top secret stuff and it might be dangerous if this gets into the wrong hands but I will have you know that it obviously involves a punch to the nose then an elbow to the neck then maybe if I can, a kick to the nuts and then a tap dance to celebrate and then another kick to the shins and then tap dance my way out of danger because the poor dude will be lying on the floor in agony by the time I tap-tap-tap my jazzy feet to the police station.

I need to learn tap dance first, of course. But that's one minor major detail *waves it off

So you see why I need to keep my fighting plan top-secret.

The thug won't know I'm going to give him a punch to the nose then an elbow to the neck then maybe if I can, a kick to the nuts and then a tap dance to celebrate and then another kick to the shins and then tap dance my way out of danger because the poor dude will be lying on the floor in agony by the time I tap-tap-tap my jazzy feet to the police station.

Deadly deadly stuff, no?

He won't know what hit him!